NewsMay 16, 2014 7:34 PM ET15,479 views

Tim Lambesis: no friendship with AILD bandmates

If you read our news item earlier today regarding the sentencing of As I Lay Dying vocalist Tim Lambesis, you may have missed the link to an extensive interview Lambesis conducted prior to his sentencing with our buddy Ryan Downey and Alternative Press. Among the many interesting things revealed was Lambesis' description of his relationship (or lack thereof) with his AILD bandmates. Here are some of the relevant exchanges:
Did anyone from As I Lay Dying come to see you? No. Well, Jordan [Mancino, drummer] came by once. We talked for a little bit. It was really emotional and we never got anywhere. He was here for maybe 30 minutes. We just scratched the surface. I thought he would come back, but he never did. Maybe he thought I was nuts. I was sitting around doing nothing but thinking. I wanted someone to talk to. I can't talk about my court case. I can't talk about this or that. So I'm going to start a book club, more or less. "Here's what I've been reading. What are your thoughts?" ... So you talked with Jordan. You didn't hear from anybody else from AILD? Jordan did return my phone call. The other [band] guys didn't return my calls when I first came home. I eventually did speak with Nick [Hipa, guitarist], really briefly. I mean, really briefly. In both cases, we never got to the details. I thought they were establishing communication, as if we'd eventually be able to talk about all of these things. But then it was almost like there was some sort of group thinking going on. It was like they all decided, collectively, not to talk to me. They cut off all communication. I sent a very long, very formal apology to all of them, trying to make amends, acknowledging how heavily my actions had impacted their lives. I got no response, so I sent another one out. In the second one, I was just like, "Look, I know I don't deserve forgiveness. But I just want to begin this process…" I got really brief responses from Nick and Jordan, acknowledging they had received it. Jordan said everybody just needed more time and that I was kind of hassling them, like, "leave us alone." So I just stopped bothering them. The last email I sent was just like, "Guys, I'm not looking for a business opportunity, or to make everything okay so we can make more records together. I just considered you guys friends for a long time…" I just wanted to reach out on a friendship level. What I really needed during this difficult time were my friends. I thought they just needed more time. These emails were spread out. The last one was like nine months after I was arrested. Looking back, I did a poor job of respecting their wishes, letting them speak when they're ready. I kept trying to reach out. I made things worse. I take responsibility for that. I realize six months is a short period of time for some people, but for a guy sitting at home by himself on house arrest… [ Laughs.] I was living in my own bubble. People choose their friends. They were in a band with me because I was a meal ticket. It was an opportunity for them to make a good income. We were business partners. They made it clear there's no concern for me on a personal level. And that's actually okay. The person I was wasn't somebody worth being concerned about, to be honest. The person I was in the last six months or so before my arrest, I wouldn't be friends with that person. I don't take it personally. But it doesn't make it any less sad. It's sad to think of all that time put into those relationships and now there's no personal concern, no friendship.
It's a great interview, and if you're into the whole Lambesis saga, it's a must-read.

38 comments

Post Comment

anonymous 5/16/2014 7:17:13 PM

Actually a really good read. I don't expect many people here to have that kind of attention span though.


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:24:26 AM

Is he really that surprised that his bandmates would rather scramble to save their recording contract with Metal Blade instead of play video games with him while he's on house arrest?


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:34:04 AM

Sucks when everyone turns their back on you because of money. It asp sucks when one persons STUPID decisions can screw the rest of the band financially and reputation wise. Don't drop the soap broseph


anonymous 5/17/2014 5:43:34 AM

he should just start a jailhouse book club called the lambesis saga.


anonymous 5/17/2014 11:04:51 AM

"If you're into the whole Lambesis saga" For most people, I believe it's not so much being "into" the situation as it is waiting for proper justice to be served.


anonymous 5/17/2014 11:23:21 AM

our buddy Ryan Downey our buddy Ryan Downey our buddy Ryan Downey our buddy Ryan Downey our buddy Ryan Downey our buddy Ryan Downey


anonymous 5/17/2014 11:23:23 AM

Meal ticket Meal ticket Meal ticket Meal ticket Meal ticket


anonymous 5/17/2014 11:27:05 AM

You were a "meal ticket" Tim? Please!!!! You're lucky they let you even be in that band! You were a HORRIBLE vocalist!


anonymous 5/17/2014 12:16:38 PM

lucky they let him in the band? he wrote all the music...they're lucky he let them play his songs in his(and jordan's) band


OrgCore 5/17/2014 1:17:26 PM

"lucky they let him in the band? he wrote all the music...they're lucky he let them play his songs in his(and jordan's) band" Tim Lambesis superfan alert.


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:36:04 PM

Timforth "Didn't do Nuffins" "Muffy McMuffins" Lambesis


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:37:14 PM

Timberg "Doesn't Even Like Spider-Man" "Loves Twilight" Lambesis


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:38:16 PM

Timbalimbadingdong "Ramblin' Man" "Bruce Jenner" Lambesis


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:41:28 PM

Tim "Lil' Timmy" "Foop" Lambesis


anonymous 5/17/2014 1:51:10 PM

Timmo "Wanna Lez Out?" "Wanna Kill My Wife?" Lambesis


anonymous 5/17/2014 2:15:21 PM

TimTom "Take My Wife, Please!" "Mr Hitman" Lambesis


anonymous 5/17/2014 2:49:33 PM

Article is a good read. Worthy of my time. Praying for this dude, his ex wife and most of all his kids. Hope for redemption and blessings for all of those involved.


anonymous 5/17/2014 3:27:23 PM

Dude's a solid musician. He's gunna write some insane music as he works through this whole experience and I can't wait to hear it. The insane oftentimes make for interesting artists.


hotsoap 5/17/2014 4:34:08 PM

This article was actually worth the read.


iwilladapt 5/17/2014 6:16:55 PM

article is worth the read and surprising well done. glad it was Ryan J. Downey who did it. i remembering listening to and liking Beneath The Encasing of Ashes and Frail Words Collapse. they will forever carry a different feeling.


anonymous 5/17/2014 7:20:30 PM

You try to have your wife killed and people don't want to hang out with you anymore, go figure.


anonymous 5/17/2014 9:11:44 PM

That feel when no AILD


anonymous 5/18/2014 1:21:13 AM

"Article is a good read. Worthy of my time. Praying for this dude, his ex wife and most of all his kids. Hope for redemption and blessings for all of those involved." fck you


anonymous 5/18/2014 4:15:28 AM

Tim Lambesis is a gay and I hope sageaBubba shows him what it's like to have your rectum dilated by the BBC network in jail.


anonymous 5/18/2014 5:10:46 AM

Honestly, I understand his side. He owned up to everything and isn't feeling sorry for himself. His wife sounds like a c*nt. Im bummed out that it didn't happen


anonymous 5/18/2014 5:54:08 AM

Kinda easy to see which of these comments are from Wovenwar


anonymous 5/18/2014 1:41:34 PM

Don't care about this c*nt enough to read the whole thing.


genghisjohn 5/19/2014 3:37:47 AM

It's amusing how this douchey jock is treating the whole deal like spilled milk.


anonymous 5/19/2014 5:30:15 AM

I'd like to read about how he'll change up his workout routine and what supps he'll be taking since he'll have limited access to things for 6 years.


anonymous 5/19/2014 6:25:19 AM

there is plenty enough of protein in prison


RickRock 5/19/2014 7:58:32 AM

Timmy "Fully Prolapsed" Lambesis


anonymous 5/19/2014 8:26:30 AM

"So I'm going to start a book club..."


anonymous 5/19/2014 9:02:18 AM

William Faulkner is stoked


anonymous 5/19/2014 10:12:08 AM

murder is kind of a dealbreaker when it comes to friendship.


anonymous 5/19/2014 4:09:48 PM

YOU TRIED TO HAVE YOUR WIFE KILLED.


anonymous 5/19/2014 5:32:35 PM

lambgoat is not stoked


snoopy2 5/21/2014 9:51:39 AM

Yeah you commit a felony that embarrasses the living fck out of your band, label, industry and fans. Now you expect friendship. If this guy isn't the epitome of arrogance and narcissism then I don't know what the fck ... um, I can't even.


anonymous 5/26/2014 8:00:58 AM

Best part is that law enforcement is allowed to entrap people and completely get away with it. Then all you mindless morons jump on your high horses like you never made one unethical choice in your life. Meanwhile your government is allowed to do whatever it wants. This county is fcked. Never mind that his ex's brother is a Sherrif deputy that's probably "just a minor coincidence."





Related News

Video: Turnstile perform on 'The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon'
The band's third late-night TV appearance in the last six months.

Deftones' Stef Carpenter to miss upcoming tour: 'I'm just not ready to leave the country yet'
A hometown friend will be filling in.