Woke up sleeping with my face on my phone. When I checked it I got 10 "no it's ok, you're a great guy" texts from hot chicks I guess I apologized for knowing because I suck. Then I wondered into my bathroom and apparently some time last night I committed violent assault on this. Unflushed pile of turds in the bowl and idk what the f*ck happened but the shower curtain was on the ground and the rings were strewn across the bathroom floor. Absolutely no idea what happened. N how r u?

Lol

I think I have a problem with my buttpipe.

Yer gonna need to get that checked out. I think dayman can help.

Do you live alone?

I've been completely sober for 24 hours. Slept great, went for a run at 5:30am You are now me

Except I never apologize. My phone would be a bunch of texts telling Biden voters to eat shit

Two nights ago I was in the same boat. I met my buddy's GF for the first time. By the time we left the bar she said "nice to meet you" and I replied "you don't don't mean that. f*ck off. Get bent" Oy vey

Damn. That's a special kind of drunk, my guy.

lol @ Pilgrim. Thats how its done

I live in a commune with hippies. Bulls here.

Lol

VodkaVeins 19 minutes ago Do you live alone? yes.... do tell.....

RAGINGf*ckMAN 3 minutes ago I live in a commune with hippies. Bulls here. aka grandma's

Dude do you want to get dropped on your fat f*cking face irl? You're a stupid piece of shit and ugly, gtfo little bitch